Confessions of a Quarantined Hypochondriac

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Quarantine Log: Day 1

(…well technically, day 15)

Soooooo today I thought I would start more of an online journal of the thoughts that enter my head as I surpassed my full two weeks of isolation from the outside world. At least for me, I am not holed up alone, so am not completely isolated from human contact, which is either a blessing or a curse some days. But I was chatting with someone on hinge last night who was telling me that he wouldn’t be able to survive more than two more weeks of this without human contact. And, let’s face it, even though I have human contact daily, I’m finally starting to go stir crazy being indoors, especially on days that are so sunny and beautiful outside. I think the one thing that bothers me the most is the uncertainty—like when will this finally end? When will everything be back to normal? Reading today that over 6 million people in the US have filed for unemployment within the last week has pretty much signaled that an economic depression is pretty much in our future once we survive this. That being said, I still am not down for a socialist regime. But those are thoughts for a more bleakish day.

I type this as I sip on my second serving of Brodo bone broth because the thing that is top of mind every single freaking minute during this is how the fuck do I keep myself healthy and my immune system strong so I don’t catch this freaking thing. I’ve been cutting down on my alcohol intake because I don’t want my immune system compromised. I’ve been resting when my body gets tired or getting under the covers if I feel chilly. Yes, some people may call me paranoid, but I think I’m just cautious. Because truth is—with the worst case scenario they show on all media outlets, who really wants this thing? Who really thought this is how the new decade would start?” All I know is that COVID-19 is not the way I’m going down. There is so much more that I want to do in this life and if I need to hole myself up until I feel like it is safe to go out, then so be it. So, thanks for joining me in the first of my rambling posts…. Signing off to actually shower now, and yes it is 3pm and I still have not showered.

Healthiness in cup

Quarantine Log Day 2: Healthy Habits

So, here I am on my 16th day of not leaving the house and 2nd day of journaling. It’s one of those rainy/cloudy days, which I think mother nature has given us as a gift since some covidiots still refuse to self isolate and think this pandemic is a big joke. Either way, I’m grateful for these days because I feel like remaining indoors is a little more warranted and easier to digest.

I have to admit that as much as I got myself into a routine last week, it went to complete shit this week. I started the week off with an allergic reaction, well technically started on Saturday evening, so was pretty much out of commission the beginning of the week as the medication left me pretty much unconscious for the most part of Monday and Tuesday. The one thing I am doing religiously while this is going on is paying more attention to my body. And for a hypochondriac, that is a VERY SCARY thing. I was almost convinced on Wednesday that I had covid. I had just finished an afternoon zoom call and felt extremely tired and chilly all of a sudden. I immediately canceled my next call, made some soup and went to bed. This was at 6pm. Granted, even with the drugs I couldn’t fall asleep till after 11pm, I was sure by staying in bed I was much better off resting my body.

The one thing I have been doing consistently this week is eating my bone broth and drinking my lemon water with tea. Whether or not they really are keeping me healthy, I believe they are and though physical health is important, also believe this is a game of mind over matter. Think our mental health will also play a huge factor in the upcoming days so think we need to do what makes us feel better and what makes us feel happy to stay strong. For me, that is my hot water with lemon and my Brodo Bone Broth. Oh, and dissolving one zinc lozenge in my mouth before I go to bed. I’m actually running low, so if anyone knows where I can get some, please message me ASAP.

Quarantine Log Day 3: Keep it Moving

Yoga around the world

Feeling more of myself today after sleeping in a little and doing some kundalini yoga this morning, which really helped my tight muscles and got the blood flowing. I am no yogi by any means and have only took kundalini once during my dear friend’s birthday last April. After this morning will definitely try my best to find more yoga practices online and make it part of my weekly routine. For any of you who are reading my blog this weekend, you can still catch the last two days of Le Yogascope’s worldwide weekend retreat on instagram. Today’s session with Yeva Don really jumpstarted my body and my mood. I literally felt every muscle in my body that probably haven’t been stretched or utilized properly since this international shitshow started. Made me realize how important movement is now more than ever. I used to run at least 3 miles with my dog before this all started and now I barely walk 1,000 steps a day. It’s not like this a shock to me or anyone reading this. Our movement has significantly decreased in the past couple of weeks. Even with the online workouts I’m doing, which were minimal this week since I was feeling under the weather, I’m not getting the same amount of activity I was getting before this all started.

So, I think now more than ever we need to be creative in trying to get the same amount of activity and movement into our daily lives. Our bodies were created to move and not be stationary. Whether it be a one mile indoor walk or a dance video on youtube, we need to keep on moving to keep our body (and minds) healthy.

QUARANTINE LOG: DAY 4

So I’ve noticed that in my quarantine times, I feel like I’ve been entangling myself in online arguments with keyboard warriors. I usually use my social media to share news—good and bad, share things that make me smile or inspire me or just general hacks or info to get us through this. Today and yesterday I found myself a little angered at some people’s lack of compassion. I belong to many expat groups since I was living in Paris for three years. In one of them a member asked how much to tip an uber eats delivery person. I answered with my personal opinion that we should be tipping more since these people are basically risking their lives out there to get you whatever it is you consider “essential”. Look, I think everyone has a right to their opinion and I was just expressing my own, but literally got attacked by a few people on there saying I was judgemental and self righteous. And I get it, the culture in France is to not tip as they are all supposed to be paid living wages, BUT we are in strange times. Some of the people who actually think that you should not tip the delivery person at all went as far as saying that it isn’t the public’s responsibility to make sure that the delivery person was compensated fairly, but the government's. I’m sorry, but I think the whole concept of socialism is the premise of society taking care of one another. What kind of selfish motherf*cker do you need to be to not have any compassion during these times. The fact of the matter is that if you have the luxury of being able to order takeout to your home, you are more fortunate than most. The fact that you have an internet connection to engage with people you don’t even know to try and justify why you are right in not tipping the delivery person because “it is not your responsibility” shows you are more fortunate than most and don’t even understand the premise of socialism. Probably also shows that your subconscious feels guilt and you need others to justify your actions by the number of likes your comment gets OR you just are unhappy in your very existence you feel the need for self validation. At the end of the day, I feel sorry for these people. If thinking that we should thank the people who do things that we don’t want to do ourselves during these difficult times makes me self righteous, I’m cool with that, but I think my beliefs make me more compassionate and more human.

Have decided to take a pause after this entry, but will be back soon.